Old habits are difficult to break. Even something as simple as a cup of coffee in the morning. I'm breaking so many old habits I'm beginning to think I'm not myself anymore. My phone is silent most of the day and I don't pick it up much. I still imagine I hear it ringing, but instead of running to see I sit still hoping for the moment to pass without temptations to check... because I know it didn't ring. A habit broken. I know I'm paranoid. I give good advice but don't follow them myself. My thoughts are in boxes instead of all over the place like they'd use to be. And I sigh whenever something reminds me and swallow yet another rock, instead of seeking refuge in another one of my escapades. I'm choosing to face everything and be inflicted till I don't feel anything anymore. Except for what's in a box on top of my cupboard. That I am not ready for.
Put on my pjs and hop into bed/I'm half alive but I've been mostly dead/I try and tell myself it'll be all right/I shouldn't think anymore tonight.
Put on my pjs and hop into bed/I'm half alive but I've been mostly dead/I try and tell myself it'll be all right/I shouldn't think anymore tonight.
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