Random Thought Bubbles

having myself wrapped up neatly into a few lines of criteria is useless

i knew all that

but i can't kick myself out of it just yet

at least i can now say nope to one of the criteria out of the two i could say no to. i'm slowly growing out of this. but i regress too much. backslide too much. it's like fighting quicksand. to think you're getting somewhere. and then everything seems to overwhelm and you don't think straight. the brain turns to cotton wool mush in a matter of seconds. and what passes for a heart turns to cold glass. that leaves nothing to lead. reality turns into a living dream and every move seems inconsequential. too many lapses in judgment. until i undermine my goal. to give myself the satisfaction of realizing yet another abandonment.

i don't want to settle for another person. enough of that.