Finally I have finished this blog. It has taken a long, long, long time to finish due to my 'tight schedule' and the incompetence of my laptop which has now decided to die on me (the hard drive is completely fried... I won't even be able to save the information! ugh!)... WARNING: VERY long read! However, I hope you find it entertaining. Since my laptop is dead I am at Amelia's place using her laptop and Stephanie's internet. It's nice having friends :)
This is The Screamer reporting the 4 days of crazy a bunch of us just had that occurred from Wednesday some weeks ago till the early hours of Sunday (that makes 4 ½ but who’s counting?).
Day 1 - The event kicked-off with a somewhat lukewarm last-minute ditch attempt at fun to celebrate our dear friend Hai Fon’s 21st birthday bash at Zouk KL (notice I added KL at the end… you’ll understand why later). The bunch of us gathered outside IMU all excited to ride convoy to Luna Bar. However that idea was wrecked because a few of us couldn’t get back in time from a Superstar live recording (what’s a live recording anyway?) so Mambo Jambo it became. I must say it was the best last minute plan anyone ever had, 2nd only to the pack-quickly-bring-your-passport-and-go that will be elaborated later. So, we’re all outside Zouk quite dejected because we were all looking forward to a chill session at Luna. I ended up being the main man buying the two bottles of Hennessy and negotiating for 5 more people to be let in (we were a party of 15). It was my very first experience in opening bottles and getting people in. What happened to the guys? No matter. They all figured I was the super clubber who knew what to do. I just go for the fun man, the bottle business is not my thing. Anyway, it was a BLAST! Never mind that the dj played ‘Play that funky music white boy’, we drank to Hai Fon’s health and age and danced the night away. Even Yon Xian was happy. Haha! As always I was the Energizer Bunny prancing everywhere and making sure everyone was getting the necessary fun infusion and guzzling on the happy juice. The two bottles disappeared quite quickly but I think the guys siphoned most of it. If anyone asks me to Mambo Jambo again I’d be there at the drop of a hat, baby!
With my trusty cameraphone I managed to capture most of the night since Gowri’s cam died on her. She’s got more crazy photos but below is what I’ve got.
Day 2 – It’s still Hai Fon’s birthday so we decided to do a little gathering for his coming of age at Ling Wei and Racine’s place. It had a very after-party mood with everyone just chilling and having an altogether quiet kind of fun. Playing ‘Happy Family’ with Ling Wei is frustrating. She waits for you to get 3 cards of a kind and pounces on ya when you miss the last card. After all the surprise parties we’ve had for the numerous friends whose birthdays are in the span of these two months, we just couldn’t stomach another one so Hai Fon was told to turn up for his party. He got cake smashed in his face and, unfortunately, also on his £60 jersey. Gowri’s got a video of him very happy to have the ‘Happy Birthday’ song sung to him and his beautiful perfect cake in front of him and then the split second look of utter disappointed and borderline ‘I could just hit you right here right now’ as Brandon smashed the cake on him. It’s hilarious! No one at the junk food we got (as always!) so we ended up bringing it all to JB the next day. Below are just a few photos of the night, after everyone left. Van Ren came with a very bad case of alcohol allergies so I don’t have any photos of her. It was a party hats and teddy bears themed party by the way but as usual only the girls brought the teddies and wore the party hats. Hehe!
Day 3 – The girls (10 of us) took a bus down to JB for the weekend. There’s a place called Zon in JB where it’s duty free and that means cheap alcohol! Since we couldn’t bring the stuff out of the place, we rented a room at the hotel in that area. It’s amazing there’s such a place in existence. I’ve still got two bottles (unopened) from the night, but those are for a different crazy night (yep, we smuggled out the unfinished stash).
The bus took forever to get to JB. It stopped for a whole half an hour at some place and when we finally got to Zon it was just before the shops closed at round 9.30pm. We bought the happy juice, checked in and settled down for a night of drinking, fun and lots of laughter. Gowri is one bengis drunk. At one point she started saying, “Sean Paul is my brotha!” and when Ling Wei repeated, “
Sean Paul is your brother!” Gowri went, “
It’s not broTHER, it’s broTHA!” Imagine the amount of shrieking and laughter that night with both Jebbrine and Gowri (the ultimate happy couple) high on Bacardi Limon. Michelle later told us the reception was wondering if there were children in our room. CHILDREN? With the noise we made I’m surprised they didn’t bang down our door complaining about the disturbance we were making.
After about 2 rounds of ‘
THE RING OF FIRE’ Stephanie had to sit out because she was the loser, no doubt a very smiley and happy loser but loser nonetheless. She was very cute about it. One bottle of Bacardi Limon down and we’re on to the Baileys. ‘Big Fish, small fish’ it is. Gowri was, by that time, not able to sit still at the end of the mattress where she was propped and she kept saying, “You can’t saboh my drink. I know OK!?” But I’m sneaking up behind her and pouring the rest of the bottle into her cup as the others watch and snicker. She was gone after that drink. She was super
SMILEY and super
HAPPY. I didn’t know Gowri could become any happier than she already always is.
As the rest of the girls started to die off one by one Van Ren, Amelia, Lina and yours truly started to put on make-up. We’d been watching ‘America’s Next Top Model’ and I decided it was a good time for a photo shoot. There were already a few photos of the rest mimicking the spider shoot they did on TV and those were crazy hilarious! But, it was time for the real serious business with make-up and everything. Haha! I was resident make-up artist. Give a drunk fella who thinks she’s got artistic license to muck up peoples’ faces a make-up kit and this is what you get. We even went outside the room and took some elevator shots. A few of the other hotel residents came out just before sun out and we (the ones with weird make-up and a bottle of Baileys) tried to hide without giggling to loudly. Amelia looks great just stoning and Van Ren (the will-be model) is looking hot doing the bengis model thing. Take special attention of all their make-up. I did them up. Muahaha! If it’s bad, don’t tell me. :P Amy actually had a stripe going down the middle of her face. She looked like a badly made-up football fan who couldn’t decide on pink, purple or black. I smudged that off and went with the usual eyeliner trick. But a drunk person cannot erase all the bad make-up off so she ended up with a little bit of a moustache and a beard. Hehe. I didn’t saboh her on purpose.
Ah Moo the stone looking exceptionally cute
Racine doing the Covergirl
This is what happens after over-saturation of the advertisement industry with Amber Chia
Miss Loser of 'THE RING OF FIRE'. Super Happy!
This is what happens after watching 'America's Next Top Model'
Ling Wei's attempt at raising Amelia's atap roof eyelashes
Now for the real serious stuff... presenting the levi's Eden collection.
Day 4 – Morning came and I got out of the bath-tub where I was sleeping. Note to everyone, when there’s no place to sleep it’s best to call the bath-tub. No one will kick you and you don’t have to elbow for space. Just add two or three towels and steal a bed sheet for a blanket. I actually had a pillow because I called house-keeping for it but in the commotion of taking photos, I forgot to take it before everyone fell asleep. My bad. Anyway, we packed, checked out and piled into taxis to go to Holiday Plaza where DVDs are abundant. After all the excellent shopping malls in KL, everywhere else looks sad. Halfway through the afternoon, the guys finally woke up (meaning Yon Xian, Kah Heng and Hai Fon who came down in a car. They’d checked in on us the night before but didn’t stay for the drinking. I think they went to eat kueh tiaw kia… I missed out on that… pork intestines and stomach… MMMmmMMMmmm). And, since we were so near Singapore and there was nothing better to do SooOOoo we decided to go to
SINGAPORE! We were Yon Xian, Kah Heng, Hai Fon, Van Ren, Lina, Amelia and The Screamer herself. I think Racine wanted to go but she didn’t bring her passport along when she left her house and it was already too late to go back when we decided to go. Ai, I still feel bad about that.
After changing some money we got into a car and got lost trying to find the gas station Michelle said we could park at so we’d be able to walk to customs. We had to wait for Ling Wei and the rest to direct us and that took up a fair bit of time. When we finally got into Singapore it was already 10 plus. No more shopping, but there was still time for ZOUK SINGAPORE! MuahahHAHAH!! We tried looking for a place for the night but failed miserably because everywhere cheap around Orchard was not vacant. The receptionist at Hotel Grand Central was really nice. He told us where Zouk was even though he knew we weren’t going to stay at that hotel and told us where else we might try and how much it’d cost. SoooOOoo, Kah Heng called his very COOOOL uncle who stays in Tanglin Park, which is a stone’s throw away from Orchard. He was actually out at the time but left his outfit to come save us. And his uncle, albeit in his 30s, is good-looking, earns a whole lot as a lawyer, is buff, is very friendly and for all I know may be able to dance even. But remember when I said that all the perfect men are either gay or unavailable. This occasion cements the statement. Anyway, his place beats any hotel that we could ever afford. It’s got Buddha statues and everything looks like it was from an interior design magazine. I hate to say we were jakun but we were. Hai Fon was too hungry to pay attention to the little house tour Hiang (that’s Kah Heng’s uncle) was giving us and busied himself with eating his tar-paued chicken rice while squatting in front of the very ornamental and antique looking table (that used to be part of a bullock cart or something along those lines). He looked very much like a famished convict. The condo was super. His uncle is super (he even left towels out for us in the morning and a note telling us to call if we needed food).
Now the 4 girls had to get ready for
ZOUK SINGAPORE! We took quite a while getting ready since we’d heard that Singapore girls are well dressed. We were relieved to see that everyone was quite conservatively attired when we got to the place since we were definitely not in our Zouk’est best. Van has a pilot in training friend and we waited for him to get there since he can get 40% off drinks. Hehe he heheh. *evil smile* It’s S$25 for girls with two drinks and S$35 for guys to get in and buying a bottle doesn’t get people in. That was kinda off. Everyone except Hai Fon was in on an empty stomach so a vodka lime and a tequila shot later both Lina and I were quite happy. But since it’s not fun without the high we started ordering more. With the super ‘AirCrew’ card the shots were at first
S$6.30 per little glass. “More, More” the people said, so back I went to bar (here, again, I’m the main man). I ordered 6 tequila shots, a beer and a vodka lime. The bill was S$44. I gave the bartender two S$50s. Haha. Stupid. “More, More” the people said again. This time I went back to the same bartender (his name is Terence), and asked for a ‘Screamer’ (6 kinds of alcohols in one shot… burns I tell you). He said he couldn’t make that in 3 shots (it’s always easier to make a drink like that in 6 shots) so he suggested an AK47 in
6 shots. Bill = S$13.80. Am I good or am I good? That was Round 1. Round 2 – Hi, Terence. I need another round. I want something fruity but strong. Can? The bill stated some beach something something drink. Still S$13.80. Round 3 – Hi, Terence. Another round!! Same thing? NO No nO. Surprise me, ok?
Bill states ‘Fantasia’, amount – S$13.80, number of shots- 10!!! Haha. This is the first time I even talked to a bartender more than once. Skills baby!! He must’ve thought I’m an SIA stewardess with the AirCrew card I kept flashing. I collected money from the rest quite high and couldn’t quite count but at one point I made money because I collect S$7 for the S$6.30 shots.
The whole reason why I was talking to Mr. Terence so much was because Hai Fon promised to dance after ‘4 or 5’ more rounds. 4 or 5 more rounds my foot! After the lot he was out like a light. *off* Haha. He was the only fella among the 8 of us that night who died-ed. The girls and everyone else more or less had the same amount of drink and the fella who ate before died. Hai Fon’s not going to hear the end of this for a few more weeks. I stayed with the baby for a bit before he vomited and when he finally hurled in the plastic bag I said (in my hyper high state), “I feel as if I just gave birth!” Haha. Too graphic a sentence now that I’m sober. The morning after, he had the nerve to delete the picture I took of him completely wasted. Haha! The only evidence of him out is where he’s lying on my leg (it looks like he’s in my crotch area… ewww!) below. Zouk Singapore was quite empty that night but no matter we were there for one night only and we weren’t going to waste it!
I can't put up pictures of this as of yet. The pictures from my phone have not be uploaded and Amy's comp won't read it and the cd on which I burnt is with Tze Ven for the convo mag... soooo... long story short... I'll post them later.
It was an
awesome 4 days. Good food (although I didn’t type much about it we had quite a bit of food. We were typical Malaysians, only coming out of stone phase when thinking of where to eat, during eating and going to eating place), lots of drink and even better company. Wouldn’t mind going through that again. We were sleep deprived most of the time and wondering why we do these things to ourselves but it was worth every second of non-sleep.
Ling Wei's attempt at raising Amelia's atap roof eyelashes
